Isn’t therapy just telling our problems to a stranger? In the beginning you are talking to a therapist who doesn’t know you. Over time that changes. Together we’ll work as a team to make positive changes happen. Telling your side of the story is necessary so your therapist can help you. Meanwhile your partner or spouse is also learning about what is important for your needs and wishes for your relationship.
Can you help us save our marriage or relationship? Yes. If you want to make it work, there are many things that can help you save your marriage. Counseling helps you understand one another in new ways. It increases respect as you take the time to focus on your relationship. And it helps you talk truthfully about what needs to change for both of you to be happy in your marriage.
Is there hope if my spouse says s/he doesn’t love me anymore or that s/he wants a divorce? That depends upon what your spouse is really saying. They may be saying they have decided to get divorced or they may be trying to convey that significant problems need fixing. Often people make these statements when they are so frustrated that they have no idea what will help. It’s important to get psychotherapy when these statements are being made.
How long will it take? How much will it cost? The sooner you get help, the quicker you can move forward in your relationship. Over time bitterness and resentment can set in and then it’s harder to want to make changes. How long you will be in therapy depends in part upon how long you’ve had problems, how ready you are to make changes and whether you take action outside of sessions. In Fort Worth, psychotherapy costs between $80 - $140 for a 50 minute session of couples therapy based on the experience of the therapist.
Can you make my spouse realize how desperate I am? I can certainly help you communicate in ways that will get your message across respectfully. Often when people get really upset they begin to blame the other person. Emotions are very important, but emotions can also cause significant communication problems. Learning new skills and tools can help you convey how desperate you are.
Can you just "fix" my spouse for me? "If only there were a magic solution as simple at that!" Differences are just a part of relationships. It’s when people take differences personally or begin to judge one another that problems arise. Learning how to live with conflicting values and beliefs and then speaking clearly for your needs are two parts of this process.
What if our schedules make it difficult to come together initially? While taking that first step of beginning therapy is important, therapy is usually more successful if it’s a journey couples start together. This provides the best opportunity for therapy to get off to a good, fair start. Trust with the therapist begins in that first meeting as each person shares their viewpoints, experiences the therapist’s style and perspective, and next actions are clarified.
